When BJ was very small and could begin to focus, he did this thing where he would not look directly at you, but specifically beside you when interacting. I remember that I began to worry about his eyesight and other things as I could not understand why he did this. I would even ask him to look me in the eyes, to which he would reply, "I am."

This was unsettling as a parent. Why was my son staring at what seemed to be a head on my left shoulder, rather than looking me in the eye? Answers did not come on this matter. However, in time, this seemed to correct itself, at least on occasion. I can still remember when he looked beside me, instead of at me. There were also many times when he would focus directly into my gaze.

As Beej got older and began sharing his faith with people, or when he was sharing about something that he had deep feeling for, this 'stray' look would often accompany his conversation. I know there were times that he looked people square in the eye when he shared with them, but there were those times that he seemingly, lost in another world, would bore a hole through adjacent space.

When BJ's friend Jack shared at his funeral celebration that "when BJ spoke to you, he wasn't just speaking to you, but to the masses," I knew exactly what he was talking about. As a matter of fact, I could recall how he would share in this way and how that 'look' would accompany what he had to say.

What he had to say was important. What he had to say was uplifting, encouraging, and at times, convicting. I think his listener(s) was(were) usually more focused on his words than the direction of his view.

The direction of his view was drawing strength and wisdom from the One who provides teaching, comfort and guidance.

I have a friend who often mimics his mother. While she is telling you something, he has so developed this little gift, that he can literally speak word for word what she is about to say, just as she says it. It is like listening to the conversation in stereo.

In a similar way, I envision Beej drawing his words from the Word as he speaks. Somehow he seemed to know just what to say to people. At times, it was as if the words were being fed directly to him by that seemingly errant gaze.

Because he walked closely with the Lord, and had an affinity for His Word, their are similarities between he and other past people of great faith. Though each of their circumstances were different, those He sent them to were drawn to the Father because of the common thread that the "I Am has sent me to you." (Ex. 3:14)


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