Monday, June 14, 2010


Deanna picking and eating berries at our hunting farm/lease.


My heart is broken for my brothers and sisters in Christ who are in the process of, or have recently gotten divorced. It is not my intent in any way to judge any who might have found themselves in this situation. Rather, I am angry at the enemy for having such a field day in the lives of my Christian siblings and their children. However, we are not without fault.

Yesterday, my pastor preached on this timely subject. He covered nearly every passage of Scripture that deals with divorce.

The bottom line is, marriage is intended to be relationship. Relationship stops happening when one or both begin seeking to have their own selfish desires met without communicating well with the other.

This is true of our relationship with Christ as well. And this relationship is to be the model for the marital one.

Every story is different. There are varying benchmarks for failure in every relationship. Unfortunately, the only one that is completely covered by His grace is the one with Him.

We do not extend grace to one another as we should. We each reach the breaking point at a different intersection.

We grow apart while living together.

How does this happen? What does it say about our relationship with Christ, when breaking the bonds of our marriage is more attractive or more of a relief than battling through side by side.

As I look around me at some of the marriages that are failing, I wonder, why Deanna and I still together? What we have endured is certainly different than what others are going through, but we have fought hard to seek Jesus, and to love and serve each other.

I am far from a "great" husband. It seems she has had to do more than her share of compromising. Still, according to our frequent conversations, I feel like our marriage is thriving. We give glory to our Father in Heaven, as we are very broken vessels and I tend to be selfish to boot! We lean on each other. We talk to each other. We hang together and love doing so. We "play" together in areas of similar 'likes,' and "play" apart on others.

I believe it works because we are seeking Him. That sounds like I am saying others aren't... and I know that not to be true. What is true, is that when personal selfishness overtakes time investment in relationship with Jesus, failure results. Sometimes on a grand scale, and sometimes its less obvious.

I am overwhelmed at the grandiose scheme of failure in Christian circles in just the last couple of years.

Who wins? The divorcees don't. The children don't. Extended families don't. Certainly Jesus doesn't. THE ENEMY DOES!

None who get divorced intend to trample on their witness for Christ. I do wonder though, how many who end their marriages, do so because they do not truly understand who they are in Christ?!

So many times, one partner does and one doesn't.

In a world of immediate gratification, who can wait upon the Lord? Apparently, 50% or less of believers.

If we didn't serve a God of mercy and grace, more of us would burn for our even greater failure in keeping relationship with our Savior.

Every person is important to Him. Our heartbreak is His heartbreak. At some point, we need to be responsible for what He has entrusted to us.

I must be sure I am doing all I can to serve my Lord, then my wife and then others. Any other order, brings about great potential for failure.

Please pray with me for our brothers and sisters who are facing this ugly venture in their lives.


dad


I begin training our summer leadership then teams, tomorrow through next week. This will likely be my last writing until late June. The team Deanna and I were to lead to Asia had to be canceled for various reasons. The Lord had already raised up the leaders for our other trips, so I will be home this summer, except for a Panama team I lead July 25 - August 1. My daughter Lauren is leading our Peru team (her first trip to the land and people her brother loved so much).

3 Comments:

At 8:41 PM, Blogger Nikki said...

Hello I just about finished I would die for you the story of Bj's life of passion and serivce for our Lord Jesus Christ. Bj's story is inspiring and challenges my own faith. Have you ever considerd making a film of his story? I think it would make such a huge impact! God bless you and your family! All for God's glory!! Bj lived this

Nikki Buttery

Nikki Buttery

 
At 9:13 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I want to thank you for keeping this blog up, even so long after what started it. It's food for thought and an encouragement to read. God bless you and your famil!

 
At 11:49 AM, Anonymous Kailla said...

Dad...ya, I know from personal experience how painful divorce can be. My gramma was left as a young woman to raise her three daughters alone after her husband had an affair with another woman. I have watched the painful consequences of this over the years, throughout my entire life. I know that its ugly. But I also know from personal experience that there is NOTHING too broken for God and that He takes anything and everything we give Him and uses it for His Eternal Glory. NOTHING Is Impossible With JESUS!!! Hallelujah.

 

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