Sunday, May 07, 2006

What a blessing it has been over the past couple of days to be present at two of MercyMe's five or more mini-concerts here in Tulsa. Saturday, after they played at Mardell's Christian Bookstore I had the privilege of going backstage and sharing with them for a few moments. It was good to hug their necks and catch up a little bit. Mike told me that they are tired from touring and ready to be home with their families (boy do I understand that last part) for a time.

While visiting, Bart asked me if I was going to be at "Church on the Move" for any of their services. He told me they had not played "Die for You" yet, as they were saving it for the fall tour. He said, "if you're going to come, we'll practice it and get it ready for you." We arranged for the 9:00am Sunday service. WOW!!!

Bart told BJ's story to an audience of several thousand. I cannot describe the range of thoughts and emotions that nearly overwhelmed me as the anthem poured forth amid pinkish spotlights. I sat alone, completely anonymous. Yet, I felt a tremendous sense of God's presence. The audience entered into aweful worship. When the song was over, their was silence. Oh how I wish I could have been seated by my son to share and enjoy the debut of his song. He would have been embarrassed, and would have struggled to somehow point to Christ in those moments.

That is what is real about all of this. God gets the glory, and people are moved and touched because of His presence. He uses His obedient, faithful ones to spread the gospel, and He honors their efforts, though they are undeserving.

Too easily do I find myself slipping into the mindset of needing to see this song become enormous, because the cost was enormous.

Know what? It doesn't matter if one more person hears the song, or knows why it was written. BJ was not obedient because he wanted songs written about his life. He was obedient because He loved Jesus, and the presence of the Holy Spirit dwelled within him urging him forward to share the gospel with whomever he could. He was faithful. But the Lord is more faithful, and though I do not recognize my surroundings, or know any of my new friends well, I have Jesus. He is all I need (and I do have to keep telling myself this).

dad (brent)



At 1:56 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hi Brent,

Boy,we miss you here. I was checking in to get an update before going to Kelsey B.'s open house. It is so nice to see Deanna singing with the praise band again.
She adds so much! This morning must have been so special, I am glad they played that for you. We are keeping you in our prayers and hoping Tulsa is becoming a home to you. Just wanted to say "hey" and tell you how much we miss ya. Take care and have a good week.
Love, Nancy, Scott, Kris & Kim

At 2:29 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I totally agree about the song, Brent. I finally picked up my preordered CD last weekend, and I sat in front of the Christian store listening to the song, crying! How awesome is that song??!! The guys did a GREAT job, and I want millions to hear it and the story behind it. But....if only one hears it and gives life to Jesus, that will fulfill God's purpose, and BJ will have been used to bring another to the Glory of our Lord! BJ does that daily, through this site, through the shirts and DVD's, etc.

God has used him MIGHTLY! But as you said, it is not for BJ, and he would not want this if he was here, but to bring ALL THE GLORY TO GOD! That was his life's mission, and still is through his memory.


Praying in Pink~

Linda Anderson

At 6:37 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hi Brent,

I bought some Inca kola saturday
for you. I will send it soon.


When my daughter Brittany comes in
june,she will bring you some more.

At 9:12 PM, Blogger Barbara Ann said...

I love that. Its amazing how the King uses one thing to bring so much glory to His name. I'm so glad that you got to share in that moment. Knowing BJ, he would have been quite ready to point the song back to the King. He would be the first to say that its not about him, its all about God. Boy, do I miss him, but all the Glory that our Lord is getting is so much more indescribable.

I got to meet mercyme the other night. They said that they were going to see you this weekend. Its incredible to see how they write from their heart and of what the Lord has taught them. Amazing.

In Awe,
Barbara Ann

At 11:33 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

hi brent,
Wow.. is the only word to describe the song.. i ran out to get it the day it first appeared on the self.. as my tears fell in the middle of wal-mart as i listened to it on my headset. The desire in my heart grew even more to just be out there telling others about the Lord. I just want to thank you for leaving these encouraging words everyday and that you are living only for God and his will.. tell Lauren i'll be praying for her while she' on her trip and that i'll catch her sometime during the fourth of july while i'm in town at camp. thanks again for be such a awesome servant for the Lord.

At 7:26 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Brent, God is using the death of BJ to bring life to many people out there.

Through your family, this site, Mercyme's song, the book that is being written...our testimonies of what this has done for our walk (I just shared it with a freind of mine last night!)and probably many other ways that I haven't even thought of. It amazes me when I see God at work like this. May God continue to bless you, your family and your work that you do. And may we all do what we need to do to help further God's Kingdom!

Florence, KY

At 9:25 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I was with Vickie on Saturday for a bridal shower and when she dropped me off, I asked her to wait while I got the MercyMe CD and played BJ's song for her. She sat there in tears, commenting how the song is so BJ. Of the little I know about him, through this website only and stories from Vickie, that was my first impression as well. But it's also important for all of us to remember, that even with all of the wonderful ways in which God has been glorified through BJ's life since his death, it still hurts. There is still a loss, still an emptiness and still a feeling of "this can't be real."

Brent and family, just know that there are still so many of us out here praying for you and with you during those very difficult moments that even the strong faith of God can't keep us from feeling this human hurt inside. Blessings to all of you...and lots and lots of HUGS!!!

At 9:56 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Brent -- I can't imagine the emotion you must have been feeling listening to MercyMe sing BJ's song because I know the emotion that flowed over me -- I just can't imagine. It is amazing how BJ allowed the Lord to use him and his life to glorify and further His Kingdom for SO many. What a blessing to know and see what glory can come from laying your life down for our Lord! It is contagious and beautiful.

At 9:57 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...


He was...

"Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us."

And while I am at it - I am thinking that "the hall" has new portraits lifted occassionally, just maybe. Hebrews 11

Continuing on my knees, friends.

PS I HAVE to get a copy...just have to find a place out in the country :)

At 10:42 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I love the CD and the accompanying DVD - it is so neat to get to know the guys better - to hear their hearts. I am so thankful for them. And for the amazing song they wrote to honor BJ and to spread the word.
Way to go God!

At 11:15 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hi! It is Angela from Fox 59! My pastor is getting ready to run the story I did on BJ and I was looking on the website to get updated. I would love to do ANOTHER story. Would your family be interested in sitting down with me?
Give me a call when you get some time. I had no idea MercyMe had written a song about BJ - I can't wait to hear it!
Angela Ganote

At 11:57 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hello Brent,

My name is Bryan Tabakian and I am a Youth Pator in Alma, AR. This past Wednesday night I shared your story,and of how BJ was victorious even in death. I Challenged our students to be obedient no matter the cost. I then asked them what would be said about their life when it came to an end. The title of the message was "Lessons from BJ on how to live to die". At the end of the service I played "I will die for you" and many kids came foward to committ their lives to Christ. A young man also asked Christ to be his Lord and Savior (praise God!). I went home that night thinking if BJ wasn' t so obiedient would this young man have ever been saved. Never the less I am encouraged that through your son's obiedence I have personally seen fruit of another brother being won to the Lord. Thank you BJ.

Seeking Him,

At 1:40 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hey Guys!
This is the Bests from Emmanuel Community Church in Fort Wayne, IN. Just wanted you all to know you are still in our prayers and how much your website means to us and all who continue to read it. Life can be so hard and it is great to see someone telling the truth about hurting and pain. Most people try to avoid it, but you all are helping us in our pain as you work through yours. I wish you didnt have to go through this pain, but thank you for sharing with us and I hope we have helped you in some small way! God is so awesome and mysterious all at the same time. Keep on spreading his word!! The Bests

At 4:13 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I wish bj could have been sitting next to you, listening to Mercyme too. As much as you miss bj, as deep and empty you may feel, hundreds of times more than that the Father loves you. And He also feels the loss of His children who haven't heard the Gospel. You, bj, Mercyme are annointed to bring so many Home with the Good News. The time will come when bj will be by your side, singing with Bart and the band, in worship together with the redeemed. For a short time, we are all in a strange land, far from Home and out of focus. Patience and Trust, my brother in Christ Jesus!
Mark, OH

At 4:54 PM, Blogger LisaTeegarden said...

So well put, Cedarburg Tina....Sometimes it does seem so unreal. GOD IS GOOD. THANK YOU MERCY ME for such a wonderful tribute to a wonderful nephew. Thank you brother for another inspired writing. GOD BLESS YOU ALL...Love you's Lisa P.S. Thanks for prayers for Mom...seems better in spirits....

At 6:52 PM, Blogger Jacktopher Meils said...

I'll be honest, I was leary of the song when I first heard it..I probably shouldn't share my reasons, but they don't matter anymore because I was failing to see what was important. It's good to see that they are ready to play that song and are excited, and I'm glad you got to hear it live.

I am going to dig through those old video tapes that I have from my mom's recordings, and find the two shows with BJ..That would be nice.


At 11:50 PM, Blogger Praying in Pink said...

Brent, coming in at the end of the day to post (and yes, I'd already read it several times!) and say that it DOES matter (and I know you know) if one more person hears the song. Today's posts point to that so clearly. It matters not because BJ needs to be famous or because his death could possibly mean more to all of you than it does right now or even because MercyMe needs to do well but because God says we die so that others may LIVE--and the life laid down on September 26 has much more fruit to bear. I'm praying for a great harvest--and workers in the field--and more!

with tender love,


At 8:32 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hi Brent,

I was at all 4 services at Church On The Move... but that Sunday 9AM service was definitely special. I too was overwhelmed after the song was over, when all we could do was remain in silence and bask in the sheer presence of the Lord that filled the place.

Even though no one knew that you were in attendance, we were all grieving your loss, but at the same time thanking God for using BJ's life in such an incredible way.

You will never know how much BJ's life has impacted the world until that day when you stand again beside BJ, speaking face to face with Christ and hear it told by Him.

God bless you.


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