Taking pictures of your children or loved ones, is often part of being a family and getting together. I have written about many pictures, and the impact they have had. You are probably sick of that. There is no doubt, that in the absence of physical presence, pictures will stand... obviously a poor substitute, but better than nothing.

My brother Brad, has taken many, many pictures of our times together. We have framed photograghs all over our house of his work. Some of family, many of nature. He has blessed us with homemade cards which always include points of interest, captured on film. Others are enlargements made just for the right time.

One Deanna has been searching for relentlessly, is of Beej playing his cello... the one we had rebuilt, as it had been my sister Lisa's, then mine. It lay dormant for many years while we grew up, then for some reason, Beej wanted to learn to play. Deanna wanted proof he did.

Years ago, just after the Columbine shootings, the Lord began to lay a tug on my heart to visit Littleton, Co. and the school. I cannot explain it to you, I only knew I had to go. I shared it with Deanna, and she did not know what to say.

I shared it with Brad, and he asked, "Why?" I could not answer. I only knew I had to go, and it carried a nervous expectation.

In October of that same year, six months to the day of the tragedy, Brad and I were visiting my sister Lynae in Colorado Springs, as her son Joshua had just been born.
We were there to support she and Rich, and to see our new nephew.

We made plans to visit Columbine H.S. Lynae and Rich had asked the same question of "why?" I still did not have an answer.

We went to the school, it was in session. As we neared, Rich put his signal on to turn in. "No! No!" I sputtered, "don't turn in, go past it."

Understandably, a bit annoyed, Rich asked where to go. I saw a turn in just past the school and directed him there. It was a park. We pulled in, drove to the back, and got out to walk to the tall hills behind the school. We saw the memorial which had been recently erected. I walked, I prayed, I sought the Lord on why I was there.

I didn't understand why I had gone, even after we were there. It was a time of tremendous spiritual battle, but I knew I had been obedient.

Upon return to Indy, I was sharing a message with the youth I was pastoring at the time. A message the Lord had laid heavily upon my heart as a result of all that had occurred (Joshua had almost died, and had to have emergency surgery... it saved his life, a life set apart for the Lord's work).

After the service, one of the students (Brennan of Haste the Day) came up to me and said, "God told me we are supposed to write a song together." My reply went something like, "then He'll have to tell me, 'cause I don't write songs."

That week, the Lord poured through me, words. Words inspired by being at Columbine, and the corresponding reading from Isaiah 13 He gave me.

I took them to Brennan. He set them to music, and recorded a rough copy. It has a haunting melody. Deanna took that song, wrote harmonies, and a cello line. For me, the cello made the song.

Deanna, Lauren, Whitney, and BJ ministered with that song at church... later, they even won a contest.

Now that Beej is home, Deanna has hunted through piles of pictures (as she scrapbooks) for just one of Beej playing the cello. No luck. The longing within her intensified. I believe she even had Brad hunting through mountains of pictures he has taken through the years... nothing.

Yesterday, we received a card from my mother, when I opened it, two pictures of BJ playing the cello, with his sisters and mother singing that very song, fell onto the floor. I immediately began to weep for this long sought after gift which we had given up on finding.

Thank you Brad for taking them! Thank you mom for giving them! Thank you Lord Jesus for meeting one more seemingly insignificant desire in our hearts!

dad

Lord willing, the girls will record that song this summer... I believe BJ's cousin David even recorded Beej playing it, so our hope is he and his cello will be on it as well.

Thank You Mount Holly, N.J. for the book! Thank you Cindi in Lakewood for the incredbile writing!!