The time has arrived when I may share with you what the Lord is doing in our lives. In doing so, I am aware of conventional wisdom which says, "don't do anything for at least a year" (from the date of your tragedy). However, I am also aware that I do not live by the laws of convention, but by the promptings of my Savior.

So much has happened since BJ died. So much was given. The price, colossal. The cost is perpetually dear, but the Lords direction has become infinitely clear.

One of the things the Lord has done in our hearts is to stir within us the need to be as close to the front of the battle lines as possible. We have resided where He led us, but His presence is moving, and so must we.

The Lord has opened up an opportunity for me to serve Him, by raising up leadership, and and wedding them with students whom He has called to go to the mission field. My role is to oversee the "Global Passage" side of Awe Star. In effect, to send the next generation of missionaries to serve their King. To make it possible for that to happen. To select what countries we will enter. To offer my body as a living sacrifice. This is a God-sized task, one I have to completely trust Him to fulfill! My resume does not prepare me for this, only the Lord has, and will.

Many of you know that Dr. Walker Moore has been doing this for many years. He is stepping over into the "Rite of Passage," where he will focus on communicating to students and their parents about what it means to pass from childhood into adulthood through a Significant Task (please know that this is an oversimplification of role responsibilities). You can learn more about this by visiting www.awestar.org. BJ experienced this on his first trip with Awe Star, and the Lord used it to change his life and ours.

He has filled us with enormous peace through the process of contemplating this change. Deanna has been ready to go for some time. I drug my feet, waiting. Waiting and watching for the Lord to reveal Himself through this journey. I was fearful that I would make a decision based on the emotional attachment to this organization. It would be easy to do.

Two weeks ago, we went to Tulsa, (as you know) to visit with each staff member, to hear their hearts, and to consider the possibilities. I honestly was not sure this was right. In our conversations, the Lord ministered deeply to my heart through the staff, and through little nuances that noone else would have understood without great explanation. "Peace like a river" flowed over me. I was so humbled to know that the Lord my God was revealing to us His plan in such a fashion.

My last day at Highland Lakes Baptist Camp will be April 14th. I will move to Tulsa to act as "vp of international operations." Deanna and the girls will remain behind to finish their respective school years. Then, we will all head to North Africa to complete a calling God placed on our sons life, one He extended and included on ours. We will spend a month there working with a specific people group.

Upon return, Deanna and I will remain in Tulsa, and our girls will return to Indiana. Leaving family behind is most difficult. We have always been very close. That will not change... the distance will.

While we have the peace of Christ in our decision, somehow it seems appropriate to quote my favorite writer. "God, I hope you know what you're doing, cause I'm muchos scardios!" (BJ Higgins)

brent (dad)