Thursday, October 13, 2005

I must tell you that each morning as I arrive at the computer, I come with a relentless ache, and have no idea what to say. I just know I want to say something, as it has been therapeutic to share. The Lord always provides.

When BJ was 13, he developed an interest in swords. Largely due to "Lord of the Rings" I believe. During his first Peru trip, he had opportunity to fill in as the "Knightmare" (Satan figure), as Michelle had been stung by a jellyfish and could not fill that role. His writings of that situation, reflected such compassion for Michelle, he seemed to know how much she wanted to participate, and the fact that she could not, was devastating.

As a result, he got to participate in swordplay (well actually it was pvc pipe but I'm not sure the difference mattered to him). There is a place in the drama, that the Christ figure and Satan, battle through a swordfight. BJ was hooked. He loved that role. He practiced it, taught it, and I would see him shadowslicing when noone was around.

For his 15th birthday we gave him two things. A well equipped stereo, and a sword. The stereo, interestingly, matched his room. It also had the capability for his x-box game system to be wired through it to give much fuller sound.

The morning of his birthday, we put his two gifts in front of his closed bedroom door. We sang Happy Birthday from outside his room. Normally, we'd serve breakfast in bed, but on this day, we chose to let him sleep. He heard us, but did not get up at that point. A few minutes later we heard his door open, and he exclaimed! The stereo box was large. He could not get out of his room until he moved it or opened it. The sword package lay inconspicuously on top.

He opened his gifts and was elated. After opening the sword, I told him that providing him with a sword was symbolic of his leaving his adolescence behind, and entering into manhood. He thanked me and that was it...I thought. Recently we found a writing of that moment. He described the two gifts and their significance to him. Though he loved the stereo, when he saw the sword package his heart leapt with anticipation. He was hoping it was, but then talked himself down, and said, "where would they find a sword?" Upon opening it, his emotions lifted. He wrote that he was thrilled. He went on to explain that this passage into manhood was huge to him. That his parents would view him this way, was enormous.

He gave the sword a place of honor in his room. He would often pull it out when he was struggling spiritually and manipulate it through the air as if to slice through the enemies attack. It's significance was further elevated when we found the writing (which can be found on a previous post) that begins "Self, I will not be satisfied..." The lines in this writing were penned 22 days after receiving the sword. "I will memorize scripture again, and read Christian books again, and spend more time in the Word. I will unsheathe my sword and stop playing (only) defense in this war. It is time to raise a revolution."

This was representative of His manhood, but was wielded as the "sword of truth" (his Bible). Just as Beej spent time honing his skills in swordplay, he increased his time in the Word, and he was prepared for battle...for the ultimate lay down his life.

Upon his death, his sword and writing were on display along with his Bible at his Calling and Celebration.

During the Celebration, Walker Moore extended a call, asking "Who will take BJ's place on the mission field?" Before the last word was uttered, I caught a glimpse of my 6 year old nephew Joshua, violently waving his raised hand from the front row. Josh was BJ's favorite cousin. They had spent hours with light sabers (from Star Wars) splaying each other, and saving the world! Beej adored him.

Joshua went forward with his daddy to take BJ's place. When asked if he knew what it was that he was doing, he responded assertively, "I'm taking BJ's place on the mission field so I can tell others about Jesus, because they don't know Him!"

Joshua has an anointing on his young life. He nearly died as a baby, but was spared through surgery on his heart/aorta. He bears the scars, but not the pain. Perhaps Walker, Joshua might be the last missionary.

BJ's sword now resides with Joshua. More importantly, the Spirit of the Lord rests with him. Pray for Josh. He bears the Cross of Christ, and he will wield his sword!
BJ was the last man to carry on the Higgins name, and while Joshua does not carry that name, he does bear the Name of Christ.

I love you Joshua,

dad (uncle brent)


At 7:46 AM, Blogger Tara Case said...

Another day to figure out what the Lord has layed before us...Im encouraged, challenged and yet again find myself looking at what i've been doing through these past 2 weeks. Everyone morning we would share what the Lord was teaching us in our quiet times or just our hearts...thank you for allowing Beej to still be part of our team and continuing to share his heart with us. Also for allowing us to share ours with you. I told lauren that I had the picture of all the Peru team sitting in a hotel room, all tight and cozy, with mom and our sisters...and you teaching us and sharing beej's heart with us. It blesses me and brings me to tears all in the time moment. I love you dad!
Tara Case

At 7:49 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Amazing!!!! Brent, your writings are so eloquent and inspiring. As I read your post today it was as if I was right there witnessing Joshua going forward to take BJ's place. BJ will live on through his cousin.

God bless you all and I am confident that with each passing day you will continue to grow stronger and stronger in HIS love. Thank you for continuing to share with us and inspire us all!

Love and blessings,
Jayden's Aunt Sarah

At 7:52 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

God bless you Brent for braving the keyboard each morning and sharing more treasures with us.

God be praised that He's providing you with all that you need, big and small - what a great God and Father He is, so loving and tender and comforting.

May your day, and those of the rest of the family, be filled with blessings and very real sense of His love as you walk the narrow road after Christ, and after Beej.

Bug hugs 'dad',

[sydney au]

At 7:56 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

On my way in to work this morning I realized how much I was looking forward to reading today's entry (hoping so, at least). I have followed this closely since nearly day 1. As I was thinking about what I would read today, and my excitement, I thought how odd it is that I do not go to church, I have many questions about my faith, yet I am drawn with magnetic force to read the entries and learn more about BJ, Christ and the Word. Thank you for bringing me closer to God...for being a vessel to teach me more about God's Word. I hope you will continue, and if not, I hope you publish what has already been written. Thanks again.

At 8:04 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Brent, when you sit down at your keyboard, you don't know what you're going to write.

Now, sitting at my keyboard, I don't know what to write--BECAUSE of what you wrote.

SPEECHLESS. Simply speechless--but praying. Praying for young Joshua, for those "in the hotel room" and beyond who take up the sword for the ultimate cause, and for those still seeking:

"'you will call upon Me and come and pray to Me, and I will listen to you. And you will seek Me and find Me, when you search for Me with all your heart. And I will be found by you,' declares the Lord." Jeremiah 29:12-14a (NASB)

Marti for the Pieper Family
praying in pink in Charleston, SC

At 8:54 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...


As I continue to check this website I am both encouraged and inspired in my walk with Christ. I am often brought to tears by your recounting of moments of BJ's life as well as your own words as you deal with his earthly loss. I, and I'm sure many others, wish that there was something that we could do to alleviate some of your suffering. Yet, the truth is that the something that we can do is to continue to pray God's peace and strength in your life. Your BJ has left a legacy to be proud of and I know that he has brought honor and glory to our God and King. As we each go through the battles in our individual lives I pray that you will one day come to understand how your own witness and that of your family has been used to build up the faith and hope of others. Early this year God gave me a task, and one day in the near future I will have a special request of you. Something I pray that will not only honor and magnify God but will also acknowledge BJ's fervor for serving and fighting for his Lord.

Know that we will continue to hold you up before the Lord, not only for your spiritual needs but also for your natural needs. i.e. medical bills

Know that our God is able to do exceedingly, abundantly, above all you can ever ask or think according to the power that worketh within you. Ephesians 3:20

We love you all!!!!!!!!
Dawn D.

At 9:04 AM, Blogger toddyoumans said...

Thank you for your words this morning. Every morning I wake up and as I'm getting ready for work I try to think of ways that I can represent Christ to those around me and especially to Andrew. I can find examples of what I should do each day in your words and the example you set by how you continue to handle all that's happened and continues to happen.

Know that I continue to lift all of you up in prayer daily. I cannot even begin to imagine what all you continue to go through each and every day. Know that God is in control and He will pull you through.

Todd, Jes & Andrew Y.

At 10:04 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

God has used Beej in so many ways that I'm sure they could not be numbered and I am greatful for that. But I wanted to share with you this morning not what God has done through Beej but what God has done through you. Yesterday you shared that you wish you had listened more for you had no clue how little time you really did have. Well...God used you to speak to my heart about that very issue I struggle with. Yesterday I took the time to listen to my son and oh how I was blessed!
Because of your honesty I have been blessed. Not just yesterday but for days to come Lord willing because I will take the time to listen to my boys even when I "think" I don't have time. Thank you oh thank you for reminding us that we don't know when God will call us home so that it is so important to make time for the important things in life!
Father thank you for Beejs journals. Thank you that You are giving the family the chance to see how you workded and changed Beej's life to resemble Christ. You are an amazing God. Thank you for all that You are.
Please continue to bring the family to a place of healing from there pain. We love them Lord. Please use us to help them.
Sister in Jesus Christ.

At 10:15 AM, Blogger mother, Aldersgate Free Methodist Church, Indpls said...

I am deeply moved by your writings today. I sit here weeping, thinking about Joshua taking on the Sword of BJ and someday taking his place on the mission field. What an amazing 6 year-old! I will be praying for Joshua.

At 10:16 AM, Blogger Aunt Maralyn & Uncle Ray said...

Now I've had my morning tears. You wrote so beautifully today about Joshua. Even though I already knew most of what you wrote, it touched me again. I was sitting right behind Rich and Joshua. Joshua could not get his hand up quick enough. He was and is so sincere about it.
Another blessing for me was to see Cladee (almost 5) raise her hand also. She also went back with her Mom. It is so great to see 2 little children so completely commited to God. They knew and understood exactly what they were doing. Cladee has talked about it since we got home and I'm sure Joshua has talked to Lynae aboutit.
I look forward each morning to coming to the computer and reading what you have written. It makes us feel closer to you even though we are miles apart.
We're still praying for all of you.
Love. Aunt Maralyn

At 10:21 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

yesterday was my son's 15th birthday. I could not stop thinking of BJ. With every card and gift I felt almost guilty for celebrating. Today you shared BJ's 15th birthday and it was so beautiful. Your family traditions are so wonderful. Again we are learning from you all. The Higgins name will live on for all of eternity because of the great calling BJ has. His ministry is not over it is just beginning.


At 11:00 AM, Blogger Lynn Andrews said...

Blessings to all of you this day! Like Marti, my neighbor in SC, I am speechless after today's story! Perhaps, it's time for all of us to "unsheath our swords". How fitting that little Joshua is willing to take up the sword in BJ's absence!

One regret that I have is that I didn't involve my children consistently in church as they were growing up. The Lord took up my slack and is present in their hearts as young adults for which I am sooooo thankful! I was baptised at the age of 16, but never really experienced being "filled" by the Holy Spirit until the "tender" age of 42 - 6 years ago. Now, I have the chance to do things differently with my grandbabies - thank you God, thank you BJ, thank you Higgins family, and thank you blog family!

A note to Linda R. in response to your post yesterday - the burden you shared hit very close to home and I will keep your daughter in my prayers. Thank you for sharing so that we can pray for you! I will ask for wisdom for you and your husband to make the right decisions and peace as you wait for God to work in His time. Your words always inspire me and I am honored to lift your family up for healing.

The "ripple" effect continues through this site - praise God!

Awestar team - bless all of you!

Lynn Andrews
Macon, GA

At 11:13 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

My heart aches that I did not get to know the amazing kid that BJ was before he was sent Home. But it brings up the question, how many "Amazing Kids" are around me still that I haven't made the time to get to know and encourage?

Still praying for each of you as you still cope with your loss.

At 11:27 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hi Dad,

I just want to thank you again for raising such an amazing godly man and allowing him to serve with us. I cherish the time that I had with BJ. Thank you. I love you all and can't stop praying.

big cabin, ok

At 12:34 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

What an awesome family, your son is still moving us all, thru your heart he still speaks. I personally am challenged to go forth strongly supporting my children in their encouragement to their friends to being obediant in the Lord and trusting his presence and his promises. You as a Awestar parent to another Awestar parent have even grown me stronger in my faith, thank you so much for sharing your strength and perseverance. Your giving all of us Hope, Love and encouragement through your trials and BJ's Love for the Lord.
I just love you all, may God continue.......may his peace and mercy be upon you...
Runner OKC

At 12:36 PM, Blogger Danzeisen5 said...

After the weeping - I am speechless. I know that nothing I can say will represent what is in my heart.
I am so struck again by the magnitude of all that is before us and all that has happened over the past couple of months. Oh how we miss him and how hard it is for Joshua that his best friend is gone. He would always say that BJ was his best friend - he still says it.
I remember that bright smile and those deep eyes, the ever changing hair styles, the depth of thought and thoughtfulness of others, the hours of game playing and talking!! I remember chasing him around the house when he was 5 or 6 with bright red lipstick on because he hated to be kissed and waiting and waiting and waiting for him to make his move on the Sequence board around the table. All these little memories bring a smile to our faces but it will be the God-given understanding of His word and passion for the lost that we will most remember! I know Joshua will never take BJ's place in our family, no one ever could. But I feel blessed beyond words that he will take his place on the mission field.
I can't tell you what it means to us that you see this calling in his life and will encourage that calling as his uncle, and Deanna as his aunt. He respects and loves you (all four of you) so much and holds deeply what you say to him.
The sword has been placed, by him, in a place where he can always see it so that "he won't ever forget BJ" and I pray that someday he will come to understand it's signifigance in his life spirtually as BJ did. I so want to have BJ's writings published so that we can have them to always challenge all of us. I pray that yours and Deanna's writings are in the devotional book as well. They minister to me deeply in places I have really needed a fresh word from God.
Thanks for thinking of all of us during your pain and for continuing to write. It means so much to me to see a glimpse into your heart...
Well, I guess I wasn't speechless (suprise!) but am deeply moved.

I love you dearly and you are in our prayers as always
Lynae (Joshua's mom)

At 12:50 PM, Blogger Cousin Beth said...

Every time I read your writings, I'm in awe of the way God is using you to bless all of us, when we should be ministering to you. God has given you a gift, and many times I wonder if you should be the one writing the book. I am so thankful that you are willing to share these intimate details with all of us. Dennis accidentally overheard you giving the sword to Joshua, and he was very moved. Now I am moved again today. Joshua truly is a very special little boy, and he had a great role model in BJ. Thank you for raising such an amazing young man. I pray daily for my kids to grow deeper in the Lord. BJ may have been the last man with the Higgins name, but just think of all the spiritual children he will have in heaven.
Sunday we were sharing about the "Celebration" of BJ's life with our church choir, and also told them about the sacrifice our grandparents made over 60 years ago when they sold their farm and left everything they knew in Wisconsin to move to Marion, Indiana. Why? So their children could go to a Christian college. I've thought many times about how that impacted all of us. How many parents today would be willing to make that kind of sacrifice? I have no doubt that because of their sacrifice, our parents walked close to God, and thus led us to know God and put Him first. It makes me really think about how much our decisions and prayers now will affect future generations.
Know that all of you are so very special to us. We appreciate so much the way you are allowing God to use you, and we constantly pray for peace and strength for you.
Love you all,

At 12:57 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Brent, Dad
Each and every day I log onto this site to hear your words of pain and joy. I too have a son named Joshua and I named him specifically after joshua out of the bible. I hope that my son can be a witness to all who knows Jesus and whom is lost out here in this scarey world. I just want to say thank you for getting the courage and strength to come to the keyboard every day to share your thoughts and emotions. Thank you for coming to the computer to share your thoughts and emotions. I hope it helps you too, with grieving for your son. I hope and pray for your Joshua and mine and all the boys and girls out in this world to stand up and fight for our God. Our children need to know how important it is to love our God and follow and only live for him. That is really all that matters on this earth.

Laura Montgomery

At 1:00 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Thank you for continuing to share with us. God bless your family, and know that you are all still in our prayers.

Bobby, Tulsa, OK

At 1:14 PM, Blogger the leaf family said...

Brent and Deanna,
Your family never ceases to amaze me. I am so blessed everyday when I get to read your words, it's always one of the first things I do in the mornings and one of the last things I do at night.. and I do check in thru out the day.Not to see if there are updates but for the encouragment..

Your words are always so encouarging for our family.
I know that Michael and Sarah read daily as well. I know that the words are a reminder of the committment they made to the Lord.
Their hearts are ready. I pray that the Lord will use them in a mighty way..

I also pray that Joshua will be used in MIGHTY ways..
Sometimes we forget how loud little voices can be.
Children always seem to make things so simple.

Matthew 18:4
Therefore, anyone who becomes as humble as this little child is the greatest in the Kingdom of Heaven.

if only we could remember how to be that Humble, honest, loving and forgiving..
"GO" Joshua and take BJ's place..

With all our love and prayers from KC-Tracy

At 2:20 PM, Blogger Walker Moore said...

I could call forth his manhood as he went to the mission field. But he took his dad to commission him into his manhood. You are a wise father, that is why God is calling you and Deanna to become the parents of the Last Generation of missionaries..and yes we might have an insight into who that is...
your servant,

At 2:26 PM, Blogger Linda Ronne said...

Dear Brent,
Thank you so much for having the courage, strength and the faith to rely on God to come to the computer daily to open your heart and your thoughts and share with us, your extended family.
I feel I must apologise for my post yesterday. I in no way wanted to distract or take away from the purpose of this wonderful site. I saw what a wonderful relationship you had with your precious Beej, and longed for that with my daughter. Please forgive me. Thank you to those who keep us in your prayers, they are truely appreciated.
I listened over and over last night to the words of the song "Held" and my heart once again broke for you and your family. The Lord gave me a small taste of your pain. I just want you to know that you are always close to my heart, in my prayers and my constant thoughts.
Coming to this blog is a part of my daily routine, checking it first thing in the morning and many times throughout the day, it is not only inspiring to hear your thoughts but to also hear the memories of other family members and friends of Beej. Thank you Brent that through your pain you are a vessel, allowing the Lord to work.
May our Lord and Savior bless you abundantly in all that you do. You are so loved, by so many.

In His Love
Linda Ronne

At 3:05 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

That is so neat. I will be praying for Josh. God Bless you all. Love ya'all!!!

Hannibal, Mo

At 3:06 PM, Blogger Ashley Reagan said...

Hey Family!
Wow... That's really all I can say right now. I'll be praying for Joshua. Thank you for continuing to share. :) I love you all!

Ashley Dawn (peru 04)
Bixby, Oklahoma

At 3:11 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

hey family,
DJ here, just wanted to say that I love you guys and that I am still praying for you. I hope that you guys have a wonderful day.
Love ya guys,

At 3:45 PM, Blogger Emily Jo said...

Hi dad, Your entry today reminds me that in order to "fight," I need the sword (God's word) and in fact, the whole armor of God. With BJ, I see how life can be so unpredictable. How many times might I have been more triumphant for the kingdom if I had only put on that armor? No regrets, for God is already victorious. But thank you for the reminder. BJ displayed and used his armor. My prayer for you today, in your wounded state, is that you will not be defenseless, or left vulnerable to the arrows of sorrow and grief. I pray that God builds you up with extra "armor", so that you may weep but be mighty, you may grieve, but be victorious, you may mourn, but be protected. May BJ's words be an added shield and tool for you today. I think of that song...."Thou O Lord, are a shield about me, you're my Glory, you're the lifter of my head." Blessings to you and the family this day....
Emily Jo
Monrovia, CA

At 4:04 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Still praying 4 your family
and friends u all mean so much 2 me!!!
love 4 ever

At 4:09 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

thank you for sharing the story about BJ's sword! i wondered abot the meaning of it when i saw it at the service. I'm taking out my sword and preparing to fight. I'm ready!
Love you and praying for you always!
~Mary Leestma

At 4:13 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Brent, what an amazing gift BJ and your girls have in you and Deanna! My children are members of the "lost generation" right now, and it pains me to see what a difference it would have made had I been a TRUE follower of Christ. I have always had belief, but did not live my life for Jesus. All that has changed since your family influenced my life! Thank you for such a wonderful gift in your suffering . . .

At 5:14 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Thank you Brent for sharing some personal thoughts with us. I check this blog a different times of the day to see how the Higgins family is doing.

I have thanked God today for your family and the testimony that you share. You are a blessing to us.


At 6:05 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

any thoughts on katrina, the mud slides, the earthquake, bj's death. are we living the book of revelations? or have similar things happened in succession throught time?

At 6:08 PM, Blogger Deanna said...

Isn't God amazing!!! He let BJ play such an important role in Joshua's life that he already is prepared to take up the sword and follow Christ!!! Thank you for sharing such an incredible story with us. I continue to lift you up to our Father. And, Brent, even though you don't know what to say, your Father continuously speaks to us through you. Don't Stop!!!

Love and prayers-

At 6:13 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

i definitely remember the day that bj told me about the sword. i called him the day after his birthday to see how he was doing, and if 15 felt any better. he said he had this insane stereo that totally matched his room, but he had something greater: a sword. i was sitting there on the other end of the line going, "a sword? does it have something to do with peru?" i was pretty much at a loss. then, he was like, "i'm a man now, sara. my parents are telling me to leave behind my adolescence and follow the Lord. I'm a man now." i was speechless. he went on to explain how much it meant to him, and how this had to be the all-time greatest gifts ever. he was ecstatic and just went on and on about this sword and how amazing it was and how i had to come see it, yet how it wouldnt make sense to me, but i still just had to come. i finally got to see it...just a little bit later than we expected. all i can say, is that sword meant soo much to him, and i hope that joshua will learn what it means, and maybe he will be the last missionary. then again, maybe joshua and the sword will spark a whole other generation filled to the brink with people in love with God, and spreading his word. how amazing would that be!?? it could start a revolution...all because of one kid, make that man, and his sword
God Bless,
Sara Hochgesang

At 6:14 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

i remember hearing about the sword and stereo.

i remember calling BJ to wish him a happy birthday after the football game i had to do band for.

i remember jack was there.

i love you guys. and praise God for memories right?
because without memories what could we do?

idk what im trying to say. ah well. love yall. you guys mean so much to me.

much love always,
rebecca hutchison(beckie)

At 6:22 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Brent, I usually read your web site in the afternoon when things settle down on the unit. We do think of you often and appreciate the updates. Thanks Betty UR

At 6:39 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

That is totally awesome. God is calling people to be missionaries(including me) and it is cool to hear about it.


At 6:45 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

What a blessing to read this. Thank you!

At 7:25 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Thank you so much for continuing to share with us glimpses into BJ's life. I love reading the stories you share, and I'm continually blessed by his enthusiasm for life and for God's Word. I continue to pray that the Lord comforts you...know that you are a blessing to us all!

Love in Christ,
Hannah Lane

At 8:08 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Mr. Higgins,
i love that fact that you and your family are so strong in the lord and continely choose to seek him, i cant image what you are going through, even the short time i spent with Bj over the summer was a treasure and he touched me in many ways, i guess what im trying to say is i wish the best for your family and im praying for you

At 8:35 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hearing what Bj has done in your lives and hearing his journal entries encourage me so much. Still praying for your significant task as gatekeepers of the mission field.
Brittany A.
Peru Uganda

At 9:55 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Dear Family,

It is wonderful to hear of BJ's life. I thought it so impressive that Walter shared about challenging the teenagers to lay down their adolescence for Christ. I'd never really thought about how the young people of today are looking for just such a challenge. It doesn't suprise me all that BJ answered such a call from Christ and took it so seriously. What a testimony to us all.

It is great that BJ carried on the family name of Christian though, and many will be in heaven because of his surrendered life. Many also are experiencing revival b/c of his testimony. I am daily going through Piper's Don't Waste Your Life and am journeling too. I am using my treadmill time to memorize the Word instead of watching TV, like I used to. I too will be able to wield my Sword in the Revolution. Thanks BJ.

I will pray for Joshua as he continues to grow in Christ and learn to take BJ's place. Is Joshua a nephew on your side of the family,Brent or on Deanna's ? Just curious since I met Deanna and her siblings as a child.

Praying you through the pain in Gray, Ga.

At 10:14 PM, Blogger Nic and Jen said...

Dear Higgins Family,
I am drawn to this site day after day. Much of the time it is hard to see my screen as my eyes are filled with tears. Today I was smiling HUGE as I read of the birthday gifts, and the sword, stereo, and xbox. I must say... I have a 10 year old son, he is going on a mission trip in June 2006. He is completing his 3rd year in a discipleship program at our church. He would LOVE the sword, and he seem so much like a younger version of BJ. Every time I read, I think WOW, my son is so much like Beej. My son loves Star Wars, Lord of the Rings, swords, xbox, all of it. And he loves God. I pray that he will have a heart like BJ. I read this site every day and I learn every day what it is to be truly on fire for the Lord. I am learning it from BJ, and through your writings. I honestly do not think there is a day that goes by that I don't look 5 times at your site. Thank you Brent, for continuing to write every day, it must be heartbreaking and so painful to do this. But I am amazed at how great our God is, He is amazingly holding you up. Using this website to minister to people around the world. God is being glorified day after day because of you continuing to share with us. You are an amazing family, and you are in our prayers. I feel like we know you, yet we are many states apart. But someday, in Heaven, we will see you. We are already brothers and sisters... in Christ!! I am saddened daily by the loss of BJ, yet I rejoice knowing he is with the Lord. It seems that death is so hard. The earthly death. And sometimes hard to get a grasp on the reality that the Believer's are with our Lord, and we should be rejoicing. I am rejoicing for you, but also weeping for you at the same time. Thank you for your continuing perseverance to do this, write daily on this site.

At 11:31 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Thank you, Brent, for continuing to share the lives of your family with us. What is therapy for you is also a tremendous ministry to the rest of us. (Thanks, too, to all the bloggers who share so beautifully from their hearts.) I pray that Deanna, Lauren and Whitney will each be blessed with an equally therapeutic outlet for their grief. All of you, your extended family, and BJ's many friends continue to be lifted often to the throne of our Heavenly Father on wings of prayer.

Anne (Marion)

At 11:44 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I lift you up in your grief. Your students and PVE friends support you, pray for you and miss you. Take your time! You'll know when you are ready to come back.

When that day comes, wow - will you be blessed beyond measure. I'm excited for you to get to experience the gentle compassion that awaits you.

Until then, be encouraged, even in your grief. I am praying for you now.
Trudy Icenogle

At 6:11 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Thank you Brent for sharing - it's amazing how I am drawn to check this website before I start my day! Bless you all for having such an impact on so many lives, DeAnn

At 11:34 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

My 13 year old son, Tyler, is getting baptized in a couple weeks. I PRAY, and ask you to pray, that GOD uses him in ways that he knows it is GOD. I hope with what I have shared about you all and Beej, that Tyler can follow the examples set for him here in ths Blog. You all are doing much more work that you think, just by sharing your hearts with all of us out here, waiting each day for a new entry!
May GOD continue to give you things to say.

Florence, Kentucky!

At 4:50 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I have been out-of pocket because of travels and I don't know the etiquette of blogging - so maybe I'm not supposed to go back and post on passed blogs, so I apologize - but this one got me.

My son is turning 16 and has loved swords and has wanted to build a forge and make them. I suddenly can see through Beej's eyes, what something like that might mean to him. Our culture doesn't have any good 'coming of age' rituals. When you are 18 you can vote, when you are 21 you can drink. What kind of statement is that?

You've helped me to recognize how important it is to honor this passage. Though I am not exactly sure how God is going to lead with figuring the logistics of this all out, if it does happen - I want to print out the original post and wrap it with the package, so Mitch can learn from BJ.

Also, I just had a friend tell me that all the elements of the armor of God are defensive except for one offensive weapon - the sword of truth. Beej obviously knew this. Joshua gets this too. What a legacy he is continuing.

Jesus peace...

Traverse City, MI

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